Tag Archives: Funny Poems

Robber and Dumber

“Right, you ready?” With a lie I say “Steady!” Sweating rivers Tights squashing face Anxious shivers Confidence no trace “On the count of three you just follow me” What did he just say? Why is he counting? This ridiculous day … Continue reading

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Ode to a Fonzie

You sneezed with such power And ate like a loon The thought of a shower Made you howl at the moon When dinner was ready I was just set to nibble You stood there so steady With your purposeful dribble … Continue reading

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Monkey Madam

I cant but expect Your avid attention On this I reflect For your comprehension I once new a Guevara monkey Who practiced mad Kung Fu He danced especially funky And cooked a rather mean stew His style caused some envy … Continue reading

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I ain’t through I’m 82!

“I’ve called you all here For my announcement” They all crowded near For her pronouncement  * “I’m leaving that’s it! I’m off for adventure!” They all ceased to sit “What is this dementia!”  ** “Granny don’t leave Who’ll knit me … Continue reading

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Whistle at my mother

Keep pushing! Breathe tight! You’ll be a mother this night! * “Its coming, he’s here! A beautiful boy!” The accumulated fear Transformed into joy  ** Nine months ago, she just thought the worst After a romantic night ended, when a … Continue reading

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Who’s the Paddy

An Ocean of green No Irish in sight What does it mean This St Patrick days night Drink till your Brain Dribbles out of your ears Till you miss your last train So you drink some more beers Finally you … Continue reading

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Thief and a Liar

My Keys! Inside! I’m truly fucked Entrance denied Idiotic conduct * “Lost ya keys have ya matey? Problems getting increasingly weighty?” ** “As a matter of fact I’m perfectly fine” My impeccable tact Refusing to whine *** “I knows of … Continue reading

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